#KloutBomb: how to game the social media gamers

Hey kids! Tired of the same old influence metrics? You know, click boring stuff like intelligence, expertise, relevance (ho hum) – the stuff your grandpa used to figure out if people were worth listening to?!? What if there were a system that let you make anybody look influential about anything online? Well there is, and it’s called Klout! (And we Beg to Differ.)
That’s right kids! On planet Klout, I’m a Unicorn expert!

Wait Dennis, when did YOU become a unicorn expert?!?

Well, funny story. I never did. And I barely ever even discuss unicorns – apart from this one blog post. But I was young!

No, my Klout page says I’m influential about unicorns because I’ve been hit with a #KloutBomb.  Other folks playing #KloutBomb (like Jeff Esposito or Amy Vernon – both excellent targets by the way) told Klout I was influential about Unicorns, and so, like magic, I am!

And sure, all of this *may* just show how hollow and game-like the whole Klout ranking system really is. But rather than railing against it, opting out, parodying it like Klouchebag by the brilliant British wag Tom Scott, or even taking a measured thoughtful approach (yawn), why not just game the Klout game for pure, deviant fun?

And here’s how you can play #Kloutbomb too!

  1. Go to a friend’s Klout page – preferably not one of those stuffed shirts who actually takes their Klout score seriously. On second thought, yeah, especially one of those! I recommend Jeff Esposito. He adores getting a good #Kloutbomb!
  2. Click the “See All…” link that appears under “Influential about (X) Topics”. This will take you to their Topics page.
  3. Give them +K. If they’ve already gotten a #Kloutbomb, you’ll see odd and humourous topics like some of those shown at right. If so, just click on the “Give +K” button to add to their score and bump up the #Kloutbomb topics in their list. You get five +K points to give out for every day you visit Klout, so don’t blow them all in one place!
  4. OR: You can add new topics by clicking on the “Add a topic”. So for example, today I gave Jeff a new topic: “Fabricated Rubber Products, Nec (Rubber Toys, Except Dolls)”. But note, this costs you five imaginary Klout bucks, so you can only do this once a day.
  5. Announce your #Kloutbomb to the world by Tweeting under that hashtag.
  6. Then, please let Beg to Differ know! Share your favourite #Kloutbomb topics in the Comments below.

Important caveat:
Keep them 1) clean and 2) as obviously ridiculous as possible please!

While it might be fun to tag your boss with “Masturbation” (yes it’s really a topic), this is the public Internet, so don’t be a total jerk or commit professional suicide. Or if you do, just don’t tell them we sent you.

Random stuff I learned at SocialMix 2012

So yesterday, I had the priviledge of meeting a bunch of my online heroes in real life at the Social Mix 2012 conference in Toronto. And while stuff is fresh in my mind (okay not *fresh-fresh* after a *few* post conference beers), here are a few things still bouncing around the old coconut.

So yesterday, store I had the priviledge of meeting a bunch of my online heroes in real life at the Social Mix 2012 conference in Toronto. And while stuff is fresh in my mind (okay not *fresh-fresh* after a *few* post conference beers), price here are a few things still bouncing around the old coconut.
Photo by Gini Dietrich of me (left) and Geoff Livingston (right).

Stuff I learned at Social Mix 2012:

  • Danny Brown and his team at Jugnoo throw a mean conference – and on pretty short notice from what Jugnoovians Lindsay Bell and Hessie Jones tell me. They put together a top notch group of speakers with a great venue and a great cause to make one really memorable event. Congratulations to all, buy more about and to Hessie’s question: “should we do this again?” YES!
  • Danny has a great accent (“rogue with the brogue” they called him), but despite that handicap, he’s a brilliant communicator, and all-around great human. Imagine a heavy Scottish accent while Danny says awesome, off-the-kilt stuff like this:
  • The biggest, and most pleasant, surprise of the day was Tim Burrows who manages social media for the Toronto Police Force. Yup. A cop. Talking social. And he’s a brilliant, self-deprecating speaker who demonstrates how focusing on your core brand values allows you to do your job better, respond to a crisis fast, and win back jaded hearts and minds for the forces of law and order. Deeply inspirational.
  • Gary Vaynerchuk owns the stage. It was my first time seeing him live. But I’d seen video, so I already knew that he swears a lot, and that sometimes he says stuff that really pisses me off: like “What’s the ROI of your mother?” But the thing is, in person, you still get pissed off, then realize a moment later that he actually does understand, care, and is keenly aware of Return On Investment in his own business. So yeah, he pokes sticks at lots of sacred cow nests (huh?), but he’s such a great performer, that you still end up in the palm of his hand.  That’s his shtick, and it works.

“Marketers ruin everything.” Gary Vaynerchuk

  • Gary’s actually at his best when he’s “off-shtick”. Yesterday, we saw him deftly handling questions yesterday from the three kinds of fans he seems to attract (1. sycophants, 2. brown-nosers, and 3. sycophantic brown-nosers), but he spikes their loaded suck-up questions back at them, and then riffs out a series of long, cogent, scary-smart ideas.
  • Gini Dietrich and Geoff Livingston are superstars and nice folks, who can lead an engaging off-the-cuff session. Yesterday they free-styled on their book Marketing in the Round. Which is hard, because they’re still in the middle of a long and (from the sounds of it) arduous tour. But even so, they made some time for a riotously fun evening out afterwards That’s Gini’s picture of me (left) and Geoff (right) at a downtown pub.
  • Geoff is a scary, scary man. In a totally cool way. One might almost call him punk. Almost.
  • Susan Murphy is spooky-good at networking. Not that I’m impressed by – or jealous of – social media “A-listers”…. no really! But holy crap my Ottawa friend Susan Murphy is good friends with a whackload of them! Including Gary, who never struck me as a huggy dude, but he veered out of his way on the way out the door to run up and give Suze a massive bearhug.
  • Matt Hixson from Portland Oregon is a smart cookie, and his company Tellagence is onto something with the idea of intelligently mapping and predicting social connections based on people’s real influence in specific interest areas. That’s all I can say… okay, it’s all I understand. But stay tuned. There’s cool stuff to come from this company.

“I don’t care about your friends or followers. I care about relationships you build – in context.” Matt Hixson

  • Apparently I have a very loud laugh. But the origin story? Not so interesting…

Updated: check out their sites

A fresh look at brand Canada. What do you think?

Just today, thanks to a tip from Dave Jones (thanks Dave!), I came across the project below sponsored by American Public Radio International (PRI) radio program Studio 360. The goal: to re-package Canada’s brand for Americans. Tall order, and I think they *mostly* nailed… something here. But what do you think? Love it? Hate it? Beg to Differ in the comments!

It’s fresh. But does it work?

Just today, adiposity thanks to a tip from Toronto agency punk Dave Jones (thanks Dave!), I came across the project below sponsored by American  Public Radio International (PRI) radio program Studio 360. The goal: to re-package Canada’s brand for Americans. Tall order, and I think they *mostly* nailed… something here. But what do you think? Love it? Hate it? Beg to Differ in the comments!

Sacrilege or divine revelation? You decide.

But before you weigh in on the success or failure of the exercise, check out these four things:

 1) A Summary: from Studio 360 of how it worked and what they were after:

To get beyond hockey, beer, and Mounties, we asked the international firm Bruce Mau Design to come up with a visual rebranding. As part of its research, the BMD team talked with Scott Thompson of the sketch comedy group The Kids in the Hall who summed up the issue simply: “We know you, but you don’t know us.”

“Canada didn’t need to be rebranded or redesigned,” explains BMD President and CEO Hunter Tura. “America needed to be educated. And that is the basis for our campaign: Know Canada.”

2) The brief: to read a more full explanation, click the image below for the agency’s presentation in PDF format:

Click here for Bruce Mau design brief (PDF format)

 3) The video teaser ad: the YouTube Video below shows how the idea would play out in multimedia format.

The big question: does it work for you?

  • Visual appeal: does the logo and design system create a memorable foundation for Canada’s brand?
  • Tag line: do the words “Know Canada” work for you? What do they say – or not say – about us?
  • Sustainability: can this really work as a brand – or is it just a clever campaign?
  • Customers: Who is it actually aimed at, and more importantly, for what purpose (i.e. who would pay to roll this out? Tourism? Trade? Canadian Chamber of Commerce?

Update: Oh, and for some more fun summer reading, you can also check out the “Know Canada” Web site here, other 360 Redesign Projects, and the paired Redesigning Project with Jian Gomeshi and CBC Radio Q taking on brand USA . Great discussion on the Brand New blog a few days ago.  Articles by Huffington Post, National Post, and Here and Elsewhere.

How to speak Bizbabble in one easy step: DON’T!

Last week, I was excited to hear that Mitel, founded by Ottawa high tech stalwart Sir Terry Matthews, had released a revolutionary new product. So as a loyal Ottawa geek eager to talk up the new device to my network, I hastened over to Mitel.com to find out more. I found this instead. And I Beg to Differ.

Try your customer’s language instead: it’s called “Human”

Last week, cure I was excited to hear that Mitel, founded by Ottawa high tech stalwart Sir Terry Matthews, had released a revolutionary new product. So as a loyal Ottawa geek eager to talk up the new device to my network, I hastened over to Mitel.com to find out more. I found this instead. And I Beg to Differ.

I call it “Bizbabble”:

“Bizbabble”: (n) a set of words arranged by well-meaning business communicators in such a way that they look like they should mean something to a human of average intelligence, while utterly failing to actually help anyone understand the thing being babbled about.

Now I mean no disrespect to the good marketing folks at Mitel. I’ve been in their shoes, and I’ve written my share of Bizbabble myself. It’s really hard to communicate well while also navigating the minefields of engineering jargon, business politics, investors, analysts, and more.

But the experience reminded me of this story. And I’m speaking here as someone on the outside who wants to help them get the message out. And to do that, I first need to understand.

10 little words

Let’s go back a bit and read the words above again: “Next-Generation Multimedia Collaboration in the Personal Office Meeting Space”. Now tell me, dear human of above average intelligence. What is this thing? What does it do? Who is it for? Is it something you want to know more about?

The best I could do was “some kind of high tech thingy that helps people collaborate” but I had no idea whether it was a conference phone, a projector, a wireless hotspot, or a mini computer, and I had no clue what a “personal office meeting space” was. A home office maybe?

The words don’t help. And neither did the press release, the product name (“UC” stands for “Unified Communications” not “ulcerative colitis” which came up first on Google) or the the (almost impossible to find listing on) the corporate site.

Nor, unfortunately, did the slickly produced little product site , which spends most of its space talking about why the product is important, but very little about what the heck it IS! And that’s the key thing anyone looking at a new product wants to know!

So here you go Mitel. I solved your problem.

If I were advising Mitel on how to position and describe this product, I’d start with a simple formula:

  • 1) Tell us what is in terms most ordinary humans are already familiar with.
  • 2) Tell us what makes it special or different from the things we’re already familiar with.
  • 3) Do it in a way that people will remember – in this case by surprising them.

So, for example, here’s what I would say their product is after reading a bunch of materials (that said a whole lot less):

“The <insert better name here>
is a conference phone on steroids.”

(Pause. Sound of crickets…)

I could go on of course, but now it’s your turn:

What do you think? Does that help? Or am I hopelessly out of touch? Any examples of simple, helpful corporate communications – especially in very technical or jargon-laden fields? Weigh in below!

Railroaded! 10 misleading brand names.

Is your name putting customers on the wrong track?

I’m excited.  Tonight I get to meet the brilliant Nora Young from CBC Radio’s Spark at the Third Tuesday Ottawa meetup! Wait… “Third Tuesday” you ask? Isn’t today the Fourth Wednesday in June?!? Um, unhealthy yeah, thumb about that name… I Beg to Differ.

My Third Tuesday story
WARNING: Contents may not be as clearly implied!

For the non-Ottawans (or those tragically not hip-enough-to-know) Third Tuesdays are evening events at a downtown Ottawa bar organized by the inimitable Joseph Thornley of Thornley Fallis, find the ProPR blog, and recently working with my online friend (and secret biz-crush) Gini “Spin Sucks” Dietrich. For Third Tuesdays, Joe flies in smart speakers on social media topics, and their talks are held in the intimate, beer-fueled atmosphere of a real social gathering. It’s social, but actually social.
And as of noon, you can still get a ticket.

Perfect right? Almost.

You see, in March, after having missed several great Third Tuesday sessions in a row (I have these three kids you see), I saw that the presenter was William Mougayar on becoming a social media entrepreneur. So I eagerly signed up online, paid my fee to attend, and booked the evening “off” child care with my wife (did I mention three kids?).

But, silly me, I booked that evening and set my Outlook appointment for – get this – the Third Tuesday of the month. Can you believe how foolish I was? Ha ha ha. Of course I should have remembered that the Third Tuesday group almost never meets on an actual Tuesday, much less the third one, and checked carefully to see what date it was actually scheduled for… my bad!

Now to Joe’s credit, when I grumbled online about this, he promptly refunded my money, apologized,  and said he hoped there were no bad feelings. And there weren’t – aren’t. But he also said this to me about the genesis of the name:

“We didn’t want to give the group a name that would tie it to terms that would rapidly become dated. So, we gave it a whimsical name that means nothing. (emphasis mine) That has allowed us to keep the content ever fresh and to follow the leading edge of thinking.”

Hmm. Can a name that seems so obviously descriptive (to my pea brain at least) really be just a “whimsical name”?

I beg to differ

And I tell my naming clients the same thing. Choosing a name that has clear descriptive overtones has a number of advantages for branders: less time explaining your product, or helping customers remember an aspect of your service – like the date for example. It’s like a pair of memory rails guiding your customer in a certain direction and reducing the friction if they go that way.

But the flip side is that a descriptive name also sets expectations that the product will continue to line up with the “rails” – so, like rails, you lose flexibility with a descriptive name as well. As I always say to clients:

You expect ’Canada Shipping Lines’ to ship stuff, but would you ever buy toothpaste from them? (Me)

Which brings me to the The Railroad Commission of Texas and 8 other examples of descriptive names that have gone off the rails – but happily pretend that they can blithely keep chugging as they churn deeper into the swamp:

10 Misleading brand names:

  1. Third Tuesdays. (See diatribe above)
  2. The Railroad Commission of Texas. If you visit the Web site, you might expect to see pictures of trains. Silly. That’s because you don’t live in Texas. If you did, according to my good friend Julie Pippert from Austin, you wouldn’t need a Wikipedia explanation of this uber-powerful state agency: “(it) regulates the oil and gas industry, gas utilities, pipeline safety, safety in the liquefied petroleum gas industry, and surface coal and uranium mining. Despite its name, it no longer regulates railroads.”
    So branders, a tip. If Wikipedia needs to include a disclaimer like that? Time to change the name!
  3. Noted bluesman Snoop Dog. (Creative Commons ceedub13)

    Ottawa Bluesfest. Funny story. Ottawa Bluesfest used to be a festival about the blues, for blues fans. But since around 2005, it turns out that you can draw a bigger(and more lucrative) crowd with Kiss, Soundgarden, the Black Eyed Peas – or this year’s headliners Snoop Dog and Iron Maiden – than you can with Stone Blind Louisiana Willy – or whoever the current top Blues star is.  Crookedmouth.net says”Bluesfest is a big, fat misnomer”, and I agree. It has become a rock festival – maybe even hard rock. Time to change the name!

  4. Apple iTunes. Once upon a time, in the days of iPods, this app was actually about tunes. Now if I want to download a movie, buy apps, update my software, or synch my iPhone calendar with my PC, I have to use this tool – which is now a comprehensive dashboard for smart devices. Time for a change Apple.
  5. History Channel. I must have missed the section in high school history where we learned about Ice Road Truckers, Ax Men and Pawn Stars. And I’m not the only one who feels that way:  Why not change the name?
  6. MTV / Music Television. In February 2010, the venerable Cable brand MTV made news by finally “bowing to the inevitable” and removing the term “Music Television” from its corporate identity. So okay. But the M in MTV still stands for “Music” and will for as long as they keep it around. And as I’ve said many times: an abbreviation is not a brand!
  7. Warning: may cause facial hair or premature Nobel prizes.

    Disney Baby Einstein. Pretty simple really. You buy a DVD; your child becomes Einstein, right? Not even close. In 2009, watchdog groups called for the name to be changed. But, as you can see, while Disney toned down the “educational” language and have shifted to saying they “create products that engage babies and make discovery fun for them and their parents” the clear implication is there. Change the name!

  8. Podcasters Across Borders (PAB). Two weeks ago, I attended the last iteration of this venerable – and mind-blowingly awesome – conference, which, it will not surprise you, was originally for Podcasters. But as time passed, and “Podcasting” became less the hip, insider cool-kid thing it once was, Mark Blevis and co started saying that the name was now “PAB”. But you also won’t be surprised that this caused confusion, consternation, apologies, and lots of onstage corrections.
  9. 140 Character Conference.   Last year, I was pitching some ideas around for speaking engagements, and saw that Jeff Pulver would be bringing his 140 Character Conference to Toronto. So I pitched him an idea, and I guess I must have used the word “Twitter” one too many times, because he sent me an abrupt – and oddly peevish (“pulverish”?) – e-mail telling me that if I had taken the time to read his site, I’d know that his conference was not about Twitter but about the emerging “real-time internet”…
    Funny thing though, I had read the site, like this part on the home page: “#140conf events provide a platform for the worldwide twitter community to: listen, connect, share and engage with each other, while collectively exploring the effects of the emerging real-time internet on business. To his credit, Jeff is now shifting from emphasis on “140” to a new master name “State of Now”, so perhaps we’re seeing the name change. Real time.
  10. Cru (formerly Campus Crusade for Christ). And speaking of changing. Here’s an example of an organization that got the message, saw the disconnect, and made the name change. And they took the heat for it from pundits like Glenn Beck who misread this as a move away from the “Christ” part of their name. But as John Piper responded:

The problem was not “Christ”. The problem was the limiting word “campus” (when CCC ministers to millions that have nothing to do with any “campus”) and “crusade” (which for millions of people has one main connotation: Medieval crusades against Muslims). Beck’s approach is not responsible journalism but careless hype for the religious right.

So how about you Brand fans? What are you doing to make Glenn Beck angry? Any examples of misleading names you’d like to see changed? Fire away in the comments below!